Scatterbrained and stuff....

I don't even know where to start.  I feel like my brains are swirling round and round in my skull.  I'm not sure what's up with me lately.  I'm usually pretty absentminded, but this is RIDICULOUS!  That's all I can say.  I keep thinking of something my grandmother used to say when I was little (actually I think I may have heard her say it the other day), "If I had brains, I'd take 'em out and play with 'em."  She also says "I feel like I'm walking down the street talkin' to myself."  I think those both fit perfectly!  I can't seem to get anything done.  My brain is just not functioning.  I'm forgetting to do basic things, like let little Oscar Dog out of his crate when I get home so I can take him for a walk.  Poor little guy just sits there at the door of his crate waiting for me while I fiddle around the house for awhile.  Then he'll wimper and I'll suddenly remember.  At work I feel like I can't even remember any of my kids name.  I'll be trying to call on one and just completely go blank.  They all look at me like I'm totally nuts.  I was trying to have a conversation with my boss this morning and could barely talk.  It's like I just couldn't think of words.  I felt like he was talking to me in some other language.

Then there's the exhaustion.  OH.MY.GOSH!  Let me just say that I'm always tired.  I mean always.  I have to drag myself to get up in the morning.  I drag myself to the shower.  Then I drag myself to the couch to rest.  Then I drag myself to get my hair and make up done.  Then I drag myself back to the couch.  Then I drag myself to get dressed.   Then I drag myself to work.  You get the idea.  I actually get up about an hour earlier than I really "need" to just so I make sure I can get everything done with all of my breaks.  I've been like this for years and I HATE it.  It drives me nuts!  But if you can imagine, it's actually been worse lately.  I just can't take it anymore.  I feel like I'm not me...like life has been sucked out of me.  I can think of nothing better than laying on my couch.  I dream of it.  I get up in the morning and the first thing that crosses my mind is "Maybe I can find a way to get in a nap today."  That's just sad.  I know it's got to be my thyroid that does this to me.  It's the only thing I can think of.  And to think, possibly with the T3 that Dr. H and Dr. G want to put me on would help with this.  But nooooooo, my stupid heart has to beat to fast so they won't let me take the stuff.  So what?  Am I just supposed to live like this forever?  Ummmmm, I don't think so.

So, I started the HCG shots on Monday...but silly me I should have started them last Saturday.  I thought she said to take them P+ 5,7,9.  But when I pulled them out on Monday I saw that I was supposed to start them on P+ 3.  Oops.  I'm assuming that it's not that big of a deal.  Nothing I can do now.  So far I like them.  I haven't really noticed much of a change in PMS symptoms (which is something Dr. G was really hoping).  But I think it may take a while to really get in my system.  I have however noticed that I haven't really had my daily headaches/migraines since I started them.  My headaches/migraines usually start a day or two before my peak and continue until cycle day 3 or so.  NO FUN!  And as usual they started again this cycle with my peak, but I haven't had on since Monday...and Monday night was my first shot.  Woohoo!  That is totally awesome because my migraines are knockmeoutcall911 kind of migraines.

You know?  Now I'm wondering if the superquadrupal exhaustion and the holy moly absentmindedness are side effects of the HCG?  Ha!  Maybe I have HCG injection induced pregnancy brain.  Haha!  I love it...that's just my luck. :)



P.S.  Please excuse the randomness and scatterbrainedness (I'm making up all kinds of words today)...it must be the fake pregnancy brain. :)