Quick Takes

1. Mary-Grace was supposed to have her 2 month check up this morning (she was 2 months old last Saturday the 21st). Well, apparently I pushed my brains out when I pushed her out because I totally thought today was Tuesday not Thursday. Oops! Fortunately the ladies at her pedi's office are super sweet and rescheduled her for next Wednesday. Two month post will come then.

2. We are full time cloth diapering now and I love it! LOVE IT!!! I have a combo of different types. I was fortunate to have a sister who cloth diapered her 2nd baby and already has all her diapers to diaper her baby girl due in July. She let me borrow several different types so I could decide what I liked. :) I settled on covers with prefolds and a few fitteds as well as Gro.via AI2's. I've got a decent stash but am thinking about getting a few fleece covers for the summer because they are more breathable. We're even using cloth wipes. It's so much fun! Not to mention her butt looks so cute. :)

3. I cannot find a dress for MG's baptism anywhere. It has to be modest and it needs to be something I can nurse in. I have also looked for skirts but haven't had much luck unless I want to spend her college tuition on it. I've got a week. Grrr!

4. I taught myself how to sew!!!! I made MG a onesie dress as well as two for my niece (the one due in July). They are so cute! I'll post pics when I get a chance. :)

5. Hey! Maybe I'll make myself a skirt for her baptism? ;)

6. My migraines have come back with a vengeance since MG was born. It sucks! That's all there is to it.

7. I'm still working on my post reflecting on MG's birth. The lack of a brain (see #1) is making it hard to have my thoughts make since. I also cry every time I sit down to work on it. Happy tears of course. Is it crazy that I have baby fever already? Because I do. And thinking about her birth makes me want to do it all over again even more.

I hope you all have a wonderful weekend! K has Monday and Tuesday off so I'm looking to a 4 day weekend with him. Yay!!!


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Random Things

I need to make an appointment with and endocrinologist.  Back in January at one of my prenatal appointments, my ob noticed that my thyroid looked huge.  He noticed this from across the room so I guess it's super noticeable.  He had some blood drawn, my TSH was way out of whack so he sent me to an endo.  The endo confirmed what my ob said and suspected that I have hashimotos.  However, he said it would be fine to put off the ultrasound of my thyroid and further testing until after MG was born.  Well, she was born 8 weeks ago so I guess I need to get on the ball.  I think I'm sort of putting it off purposely.  Aside from my serious distrust of doctors, I'm sort of nervous.  I think I'm scared of what they might find during the ultrasound.  I had one done about 8 or so years ago and there was something there.  I was supposed to go back in a few months and have it done again to see if it grew and I never went back.  I've got a little of my Nana in me.  What I don't know can't hurt me right? Right?  K has been on me to make the appointment. He's right, I need to go.  I'm tired of being tired and foggy.  If someone is finally willing to help me I should take advantage.  I'm just really scared.

I'm finally getting on the ball with cloth diapering and I LOVE IT!  Seriously!  MG was starting to get rashy but since we've had her in cloth it is completely gone!  I was very fortunate to have a sister who has already cloth diapered one baby and will be cloth diapering her little girl due in July.  She's already got a huge stash for little Olivia and let me tryout some of what she has so I could see what I liked.  I thought I hated prefolds until she introduced me to these.  They are extended tab prefolds.  Seriously awesome!  I love them!  I've been using those along with thirsties covers as well as some covers I got off of etsy.  So easy!  K is even comfortable with them.  I love not having to spend my right arm on disposables.  Not to mention they are just so darn cute!!!

MG has this rash over a lot of her body.  It's more concentrated on her trunk but does extend a bit to her arms and legs.  I've called her pedi and he doesn't sound too concerned because she is acting normally and doesn't have a fever.  I'm still nervous though.  She's got her 2 month appointment next week but I'm thinking about trying to convince him to let me bring her in a bit early.  I know it's probably nothing but I worry.  Anyone have experience with rashes?

The family drama I mentioned the other day is still going on.  It's really really bad.  My feelings are very very hurt and I'm super ticked off that this is something that affects (or is it effects? I'm so bad with that one and I'm too lazy to look it up right now) MG more than anyone.  I think for the first time in my life I actually felt rage.  I have never in my life felt the way I felt.  I'm working on not being so angry about it but this time it's really hard.  The little things have been adding up with this person and this one just took the cake.  Some distance would be really good and I believe necessary but that's very difficult when it comes to family.  It doesn't help that I'm a total pushover and have trouble sticking to my guns even when it is absolutely necessary.  I'm very upset with myself for letting this person get to me the way I am.  It helps to know that K feels the same way.  He doesn't ever get angry about anything.  EVER!  I'm serious.  I've never heard him raise his voice and everything rolls right off his back.  Not so much this time.

My favorite priest, Fr. C, that I've mentioned several times here is leaving us. :(  He's going to another parish about an hour away.  I nearly cried when I heard.  K and I have developed a wonderful relationship with him and he loves MG.  He has been giving her blessings since long before she was born.  :)  When I was in labor K let a friend of ours from church know (she runs the youth program we work with).  She was at church at the time and went to tell Fr. C about how long my labor was lasting.  Apparently he went directly too the chapel and knelt before a statue of Mary and prayed for quite a long time.  He has an amazing devotion to Mary and has helped to cultivate the devotion K and I now have.  He really is a special priest and we will miss him so much.  His last weekend is the weekend of MG's baptism.  Although he is not doing the baptism (Fr. R does all baptisms) he is hoping to be able to attend it.  I'm praying he makes it.

I bought finally bought some coconut oil for my face.  Oh my gosh!  My skin is so soft!  LOVE IT!

I figured out how to use my sewing machine!  Wahoo!  I've only had the thing for 5 years.  I made a little pillowcase dress and it is super cute!  It only look having to take it apart about 3 times.  But unfortunately I made it too small for MG.  :(  I guess little Olivia is getting a pillowcase dress at her shower this weekend. ;)

Every two years K goes with his boss and cousin (who is a fellow engineer where he works) on a business trip sort of thing.  It's more like continuing education.  It's always at some swanky hotel somewhere here in FL on the beach.  Of course families are invited too. :)  This year it's in Miami (blech!) at this hotel.  I sooooo don't fit in at a place like that.  But it should be fun.  And it's all expenses pain.  Can't beat a free vacation.  For MG and me anyway.  Poor K has to take classes majority of the time we are there. :(

If you guys have a minutes could you say a prayer for a few of my family members?  Two weeks ago my Nana's niece was traveling through SC with her husband, daugher, and granddaughter on their way home from vacation when a speeding truck pulling a trailer swirved around an SUV causing the SUV to flip and then crossed the median and hit Aunt P's car head on.  Aunt P's husbad R was killed instantly.  E, Aunt P's daughter later died in the hospital.  Aunt P was initially thought to be brain but that has since changed.  They do believe she will somewhat recover.  Her granddaughter (who is only 3 years old) is going to make it but it's going to be a very long recovery.  Both of her legs are broken and her nose was cut off amoung other injuries.  Any prayers you could offer for them would be amazing.

CD1?

Seriously?  Already?  But my baby was just born 7 weeks ago...and I'm breastfeeding.  I know not everyone gets the joy of no periods the entire time they bf but I thought for sure I'd get a little time.  I just finally stopped all the bleeding from her birth like a week and a half ago.  I'm not ready for this yet!

I should have known something was up yesterday.  I was feeling pretty crampy but didn't think much of it.  CD1 was so far from my mind that it never crossed my mind that that is what could possibly be going on.  But nope, there it was this morning and the cramps today are on par with how they were before Mary-Grace.  I was secretly hoping that that things would be different after she was born,  Like somehow pregnancy magically cured me.  Haha!  Riiiiight!  Because that's how it works.

I'm tempted to take one of the per.cocet I have left over from her birth.  My abdomen, back, hips, legs, are killing me.  Just like before.  It still boggles my mind that this effects my legs.  That's just crazy.

I know I need surgery.  I know this.  I just don't want to do it.  Can you have surgery while bfing?

And you know what?  I really don't want to chart again.  I'm just too lazy.  I get sick of checking all day and remembering to have K write it down at night.  Part of me was thinking why bother?  I mean, if I did happen to get pregnant again it's not like we would be upset.  It took us so long for MG.  I can't imagine that it would happen right away again.  My body wasn't fixed when I got pregnant, she was truly a miracle.  My body is still broken.  But if God blessed with another one right away we would be more than ok with that.  But at the same time, the control freak in me needs to know exactly what is going on with my body at all times.  I need to know where I am in my cycle.  I don't like surprises.  Except surprise pregnancies.  That would be fun.

I think I'm going to give my cycles a few months (maybe 3-6) and if things as far as pain don't get better I'm calling my doctors.  I would love to have Dr. H do my surgery but that's just out of the question.  I can't afford to go to Omaha and my insurance won't cover him at all.  I was thinking about going to place in Atlanta that Sew went to but my insurance won't cover them either.  There is just no way we can pay for that with me not working.  But the good thing is that my doctors are really good at this sort of thing.  As much as I complained about them during my pregnancy they really are great doctors.  I learned that during MG's birth.  And they have an amazing reputation in Florida.  A friend of mine from church was a labor and delivery nurse for 25 years and worked with them often.  She now works with them in their new surgery center (They have their own surgery center at the hospital).  She was telling me about all the new techniques they use.  She told me that if I chose to have surgery with them I would be in good hands.  I believe her. 

I'm just done with this pain.  DONE!  I've been dealing with this nightmare since I was 9 years old.  So almost 20 years.  That is just insane.  Absolutely insane.  I can't hardly move right now.  Fortunately MG is still young enough that parking my butt on the couch or in bed all day is still ok.  As long as I hold her she is ok.  But it won't be long and that won't work so well.  I don't want this to affect her.  Something needs to be done.

On a completely different note.  I'm finally teaching myself to sew.  K bought me a sewing machine almost 5 years ago because I just had to have it.  Unfortunately I never got around to learning.  I'm starting off my making a simple pillowcase dress for MG.  It's really just sewing a bunch of straight lines.  I can do that!  If it turns out well I'll post pictures when I'm done.  If not, well we'll just pretend I didn't tell you about this. OK? :)  This conversation never happened. :)

Picture Post with WAY Too Many Pictures

I've got absolutely zero braincells lately.  MG has been having some major tummy/gas issues that seem to be at their worst at night so sleep is very hard to come by.  We're also dealing with some ridiculous family drama that kept me up last night.  Have I ever told y'all how much I HATE drama?  Well I do.  And unfortunately this drama has lead K and I to believe that we need to distance ourselves from someone and it's very very sad. :(  I wish I could post about it, I could really use some advice because I'm really at a loss for words.  I'm not sure if it's a good idea though...just in case.  I've almost got my post done on my thoughts on her birth and hope to have it up this week.  Of course I've said that before. :)  So until then, enjoy some pictures of the last few weeks.

Easter!

My Peanut and Me.  I wish I would have gotten one with K too.

Her first Easter Basket.

"I don't like this family tradition Momma!"

"Thank you for saving me Daddy!"

Baptism Invitation Photo Shoot

 Fun!

What MG?  You don't like tummy time?

Mother's Day

The sun totally messed up this pic...and my eyes are closed...but I just love her face!  Looks like I'm torturing the poor child.

First Time In The Pool

"I don't know about this whole pool thing Momma."

"Seriously Momma! I don't wanna go!"

"Oh, I think I might like this."

I hope you all had a blessed weekend.  I was thrilled to be able to celebrate my first Mother's Day but my heart was so heavy thinking of all of you still waiting.  Please know that you were all in my prayers and K and I prayed a Rosary for you Sunday morning.

Mary Grace - One Month

This should have posted on April 21st.  I'm a little behind.

Mary-Grace,

I can't believe it's been one month already.  I feel like just yesterday I laid my eyes on your for the first time.  Time is moving by so quickly.  I love to see how much you change every day but at times wish it would slow down just a bit.

I wish I could have recorded what was going through my mind here.  There really are no words.

In your short month here on earth you have already earned yourself all sorts of nicknames.  Daddy and I call you Pea Pod, Sweet Pea, Peanut, Peanut Butter, Peanut Brittle,Pumpkin, Pumpkin Butt, Mud Pants, Squiggles, Princess, and Fussy Pants (even though your rarely fuss).

This picture would make you think otherwise. :)

You have such a special bond with your daddy.  Sure you love me, and I know that.  But you look at your daddy differently.  I love how the two of you stare at each other.  It's like you're talking to each other with your eyes.  He loves to give you kisses and you love them too.

 

You also love to sleep on your daddy's chest.  When I try to lay with you like this you squirm and squirm and never settle down.  But when I lay you on your daddy you lift your head to look in his eyes and then lay down and fall fast asleep.  It melts my heart every time. :)

Everyone tells me how much you look like me.  I didn't believe it at first until I looked at my baby pictures (I wish I had one to post).  You are definitely my little mini me.  I love that.  You have long fingers and toes just like me.  I wonder if you'll play the piano.  I always wish that I did.  You have a head full of dark hair and a cowlick in the same place I do.  I'm sorry about that. :)  However, you second toe is longer than your first just like your daddy.  You also have his head shape and we're beginning to believe your eyes are going to be blue just like his.  Every day I'm seeing more and more of him in you.  Especially in your laid back personality.

I love to watch you sleep.  You always look so peaceful and content.  I love how you give us the biggest smiles when you are sound asleep and I wonder what you are dreaming of.  Milk I'm sure. :)  Every night when I go to bed I pray that God protects you and I ask Mary to hold you in her arms since I cannot.  I often wonder if you can feel her embrace.

Little Houdini always gets that right arm out!

My prayer for you is that you will always love our Lord.  That you will love Our Lady who will comfort you and always point you to her Son.  That you will grow to be the person God intended you to be.  And that you will always know how much your momma and daddy love you.

I love you peanut.  Thank you so much for making me a mommy.

One Month Stats:

10lbs 3 oz (up from 8lbs 7 ozs)

22.9 inches (up from 21.5)