Tuesday, July 6, 2010

A little of This...A little of That

Seeing the family on the 4th after the big announcement went great!  They were so happy that it eased my nerves quickly.  There was one family member who confused me a bit with her reaction but I wasn't surprised.  It was exactly what I expected from said family member.  You can't win them all.

We are down to about a week and a half until my first confession. While still a bit nervous I am really beginning to look forward to it.  All throughout the day I think of things from my past that I just can't wait to get off my chest.  I'm looking at it as a free psychologist appointment.  I know that when I walk out of that confessional I am going to feel so much lighter.  I feel like it will be the beginning.  I can let all my mistakes and sins of the past go and just start over.  LOVELY!

I'm still reading Scott Hahn's book Signs of Life but I'm also reading another book at the same time (I'm a bit crazy like that).  DH's aunt game me Surprised by Truth by Patrick Madrid and forwarded by Scott Hahn.  I LOVE it!  Seriously!  It's a book that has the conversion stories of eleven converts.  The stories are so unbelievably amazing!  I seriously cannot put the book down!  I started reading it yesterday morning while dh and I were sitting at Panera having breakfast and am almost done with the book.  I see so much of myself in so many of these people.  It's truly amazing.

Today is P+4.  My brain is already starting to play tricks on me.  If you guys could get into my head during the 2ww you would run screaming.  It's a very scary place to be.  Sometimes I wish I could take a vacation from it.  :)  Thanks to dh we "used" all of our good days.  I'm telling you though, if dh didn't help me with my charting I might have blew right over them out of fear.  He's a good man I tell ya.  So, if all does not go well I will be starting next Wed or Thurs, the 14th or 15th.  Let's pray that doesn't happen. :)  Prayer buddy, you've got some work to do.  Haha.  Is that allowed?  DH pointed out that if all does go well I would be able to find out on the 18th (do to the hcg injections I'm supposed to wait until P+17 to test).  This is the day after my first Holy Communion.  However, I pointed out to him that if I make it past next Thursday I'm going to seriously start getting my hopes up.  I won't be able to help it.  I have never ever ever made it past a 13 day lp.  Not even once.

I've really been noticing lately how much dh wants a baby.  It's funny because over the last few years he has really done such a great job supporting me (and still does) that he hasn't let me see how much it means to him.  Lately I've noticed the look in his eyes when he sees a new baby or how happy he was playing with his cousins girls on Sunday.  He told me that someone at work made a pretty rude comment to him at work the other day that left him feeling a little teary.  It made me feel horrible.  I want nothing more in this world than to make him a daddy.  I'm just so glad that I have him to go through this with.  I couldn't imagine a more supportive man to have by my side.  I really do believe that God planned us for each other.  It's funny because while at the in-laws house this weekend 3 of his aunts pointed out this very thing.  I really am so blessed.